Who says only Govinda can shake a leg singing “It happens only in India”? As a “Madrasi” ( a rather proud one, at that too ), I think we deserve a song of our own!
But honestly, no matter where I go, I feel this incredible seven-day itch, at the end of one week, you begin carving for good old Chennai. For most of my Non-Resident Chennai friends( otherwise known as the ‘dense ones’), they just cannot fathom, what I could possibly miss about “Stinky roads” ( so, no city is perfect), Spitting people( yes, and if you don’t shut up, I Will turn into one of them) and idli-sambar( it is healthy and delicious!)
Chennai has it’s quirks, I am not denying that, but probably that’s what I love most about the city. It has character and personality. She can be the young, vibrant hip “Chennai’ (pronounced Sha-naaaaI) at one moment and be the classic, demur Madras the very next, slipping in and out of each role, with more ease than Kushboo (our very own non-Tamil daughter of Tamil Nadu J ).
However, what makes Chennai so special, is that fact that she can be both Trendy and traditional at the same time , in a way so uniquely Chennai, that it might seem very bizarre to well the less privileged .. non Chennai ones.
TOP 10 TYPICAL CHENNAI CHARACTERISITCS.
1) CURD RICE CULT
Whether you go to a Chinese, Italian, Continental restaurant. There is one dish always common on the menu. CURD RICE. Curd Rice, has a cult status in Chennai, it is more than a dish. It works as an appetizer, a main course and also as a dessert. Hungry after school ? Curd rice, Stomach queasy after a Mexican meal ? Curd rice. Need to pack a quick Tiffin box for your kid? CURD RICE
2) THE MULTI-TASKING NIGHT-DRESS
Walk into any public swimming pool in Chennai and you will see the nightdress masquerading as swimwear. This trend persists, despite most swimming pools hanging hug boards which proclaim “ salwars and night clothes – STRICTLY NOT ALLOWED”. The Nighty also multi-tasks as ‘vegetable-haggling wear’, ‘ short –walk around the corner – wear’ and of course, team it with a towel and it becomes the best ‘bath- robe’ you can ever ask for.
3) THE PETERS AND THE PANDIS
In Madras you can be one out of two categories: The “Peter” ( anyone who incessantly talks in English, and throws a new multi-syllabic words) and then you have the Pandis ( the ones who speak cockney Tamil ).However , in order to be considered cool , you need to strike “ A fine Balance” ( Robin Minstry , are you hearing this one ?) between the Peter and the Paandi. You should speak grammatically correct english, but add your own Paandi seasonings .
For example
Peter : What are you doing ?
Pandi: Yenna da pannarai ?
Perfect: What are you pannifying da?
4) AUTO VS SHARE AUTO
If you see, nineteen people squeezed into one groaning, small yellow box. You have just witnessed Chennai’s very own Share Auto. Where else can you go from Adyar to Annanagar ( one end of the town to another) for just Rs.7? Share Auto’s are a phenomenon of their own, the stop where the please, take in as many people as they please and then make sure that they don’t miss a single bump on the road. It’s kind of like the Roller –Coaster ride in MGM, only for one-fourth the price.
The autos however, are another story; words like meter and normal charge don’t exist. All autos here work on flat rates, take it or leave it. Of course, try bargaining with one driver and you get to hear the entire sob story , starting from inflation, to school fees, to petrol prices. The most remarkable feature is of course that every single auto-driver will have the same story to tell! Try scorning one auto driver , about his high charges, and well, he might just ask you to go take a ‘share-auto’ ( akin to calling you a cheapskate)
5) THE CHENNAI SMELL
How does Chennai smell? Like a mixture of Fresh coffee, jasmine flowers and pound of excreta ( ugh)
Just when you inhale the lovely smell of fresh aromatic “ madras Filter Coffee”, from the shop down you lane, your other nostril is probably inhaling something just as well… .. ummm.. Whether it is the NON-TOILET TRAINED CHENNAI MALE or the ‘infamous’ Cooum, be sure to be greeted with a variety of smells. Other common smells include, the Garbage truck ( which will trail you for the entire 15 kms u travel), Cow Dung ( you never know will find it ) and jasmine flowers.
- TO BE CONTINUED -
But honestly, no matter where I go, I feel this incredible seven-day itch, at the end of one week, you begin carving for good old Chennai. For most of my Non-Resident Chennai friends( otherwise known as the ‘dense ones’), they just cannot fathom, what I could possibly miss about “Stinky roads” ( so, no city is perfect), Spitting people( yes, and if you don’t shut up, I Will turn into one of them) and idli-sambar( it is healthy and delicious!)
Chennai has it’s quirks, I am not denying that, but probably that’s what I love most about the city. It has character and personality. She can be the young, vibrant hip “Chennai’ (pronounced Sha-naaaaI) at one moment and be the classic, demur Madras the very next, slipping in and out of each role, with more ease than Kushboo (our very own non-Tamil daughter of Tamil Nadu J ).
However, what makes Chennai so special, is that fact that she can be both Trendy and traditional at the same time , in a way so uniquely Chennai, that it might seem very bizarre to well the less privileged .. non Chennai ones.
TOP 10 TYPICAL CHENNAI CHARACTERISITCS.
1) CURD RICE CULT
Whether you go to a Chinese, Italian, Continental restaurant. There is one dish always common on the menu. CURD RICE. Curd Rice, has a cult status in Chennai, it is more than a dish. It works as an appetizer, a main course and also as a dessert. Hungry after school ? Curd rice, Stomach queasy after a Mexican meal ? Curd rice. Need to pack a quick Tiffin box for your kid? CURD RICE
2) THE MULTI-TASKING NIGHT-DRESS
Walk into any public swimming pool in Chennai and you will see the nightdress masquerading as swimwear. This trend persists, despite most swimming pools hanging hug boards which proclaim “ salwars and night clothes – STRICTLY NOT ALLOWED”. The Nighty also multi-tasks as ‘vegetable-haggling wear’, ‘ short –walk around the corner – wear’ and of course, team it with a towel and it becomes the best ‘bath- robe’ you can ever ask for.
3) THE PETERS AND THE PANDIS
In Madras you can be one out of two categories: The “Peter” ( anyone who incessantly talks in English, and throws a new multi-syllabic words) and then you have the Pandis ( the ones who speak cockney Tamil ).However , in order to be considered cool , you need to strike “ A fine Balance” ( Robin Minstry , are you hearing this one ?) between the Peter and the Paandi. You should speak grammatically correct english, but add your own Paandi seasonings .
For example
Peter : What are you doing ?
Pandi: Yenna da pannarai ?
Perfect: What are you pannifying da?
4) AUTO VS SHARE AUTO
If you see, nineteen people squeezed into one groaning, small yellow box. You have just witnessed Chennai’s very own Share Auto. Where else can you go from Adyar to Annanagar ( one end of the town to another) for just Rs.7? Share Auto’s are a phenomenon of their own, the stop where the please, take in as many people as they please and then make sure that they don’t miss a single bump on the road. It’s kind of like the Roller –Coaster ride in MGM, only for one-fourth the price.
The autos however, are another story; words like meter and normal charge don’t exist. All autos here work on flat rates, take it or leave it. Of course, try bargaining with one driver and you get to hear the entire sob story , starting from inflation, to school fees, to petrol prices. The most remarkable feature is of course that every single auto-driver will have the same story to tell! Try scorning one auto driver , about his high charges, and well, he might just ask you to go take a ‘share-auto’ ( akin to calling you a cheapskate)
5) THE CHENNAI SMELL
How does Chennai smell? Like a mixture of Fresh coffee, jasmine flowers and pound of excreta ( ugh)
Just when you inhale the lovely smell of fresh aromatic “ madras Filter Coffee”, from the shop down you lane, your other nostril is probably inhaling something just as well… .. ummm.. Whether it is the NON-TOILET TRAINED CHENNAI MALE or the ‘infamous’ Cooum, be sure to be greeted with a variety of smells. Other common smells include, the Garbage truck ( which will trail you for the entire 15 kms u travel), Cow Dung ( you never know will find it ) and jasmine flowers.
- TO BE CONTINUED -
